Sunday, 4 December 2011

Coconut Crush

Monday December 5th, 2011; 13:05
Location: Ubud, Bali Indonesia
Why: Crazy for coconuts. And surf boys.

Being boy crazy is sooo yesterday.

Today, I am coo coo for coconut.

A couple of days ago, I cracked open my first one. With a machete no less. My lovely house mate Jasmine bought us 10 of nature's finest creation. They leisurely lay outside on the front porch next to Jasmine's sculpture which are another fine creation. But that's another post.

Alright, so how does a city slicker, dirt-bag backpacker feel about using a machete? Well, considering I get intimidated by my own set of Henckels at home, you can imagine my trepidation of possibly lobbing off a finger or two. Or three. Btw Zameer, this is the Hawaiian method. I would definitely hack my hand off if it were the Trinidad application.

Anyway, I was excited like a kid in a candy store.

After watching Jasmine easily chop open the first coconut, I thought, piece of cake. And it was! Then, it was my turn.

There are four things you should have at the ready when going to open one of these bad boys.
1. A sharp machete
2. Spoon for scooping out the flesh
3. Pot or bowl for collecting the coconut water
4. Cloth for wiping the dirt off the coconut

After picking out a small-ish one from the lot, I wiped her down and set her on the earth. There are three mounds at the bottom of a coconut. It is here where I will be hacking off each mound to reveal the soft area, kind of like a baby's soft spot above the forehead.

Using my machete muscles. The idea is to swing and let the weight of the machete cut through the hard surface:

And of course, keeping my fingers well away from the machete:
Once each side of the mound has been cut away, using the end of the machete at the handle end, I cut open a little hole for the coconut water to pour out:

Collecting the liquid gold:

Once the water has been collected, next is to halve the coconut and dig out the meat. If the coconut is perfectly ripe, the flesh should be fairly easy to scrape off.

This is where the spoon and cloth comes in handy:

I am so happy, giddy like a school girl:

Hmmm, I notice I'm getting lighter. May be time to hit a beach again soon. Uluwatu, here I come! On Friday. I'm sure I'll have a story for that. I mean with a name like Ulu (as the locals call it), sounds heavenly already. Oh! And it's THE hotspot for surfing. OMG, surf boys. Yuh-mmy! And getting there on my pink Scoopy, hello! Surf boys, scooters, white sand and blue waters - more googliness than my beating heart can handle. Boy crazy? Who am I kiddin'?

But I digress. Again.

Right, so after all the cutting and scraping and collecting, you have the ingredients for a drink fit for kings and queers. And queens.

Throw them in the jug:

Give it a wild spin in the love blender:

Pour into love glass:

 Display against love fruits and love machete:

Add some cinnamon love and there you have it, Nectar Of The Gods:

The kid in the candy store drinks it like a Goddess:
I love my life. I wonder what new discoveries await me tomorrow....

1 comment:

  1. i love the play by play...and happy to hear you still have all 10 fingers.